Monday, October 13, 2008

Free beer and food at company functions = good times

Well, we have just ended week 5 of our Korean journey!  The week was uneventful for me.  Got a nice little day flu thingy on Friday so I layed around all weekend with a box of Kleenex and some Tylenol (thank you Bob and Hillary!).  
Fortunately, I recovered quickly from my brush with death (my cold) and was able to attend our company picnic/sports day.  Sara and I dressed in our finest...soccer shorts rolled as high as they would go, sweatshirts, soccer socks and some glare...we wanted them to know we meant business!  We partook in the most intense and competitive game of dodge ball that I have ever encountered, tug-of-war (my team had all the fat kids, myself included), Korean see-saw (taking the smallest Korean woman on your team and flinging her down a line of 30 people, 4 feet off the ground on a thin piece of fabric), balloon blowing up contest, and giant ball bouncing contest.  We also indulged in a battle of the branches karaoke competition where Sara and I manhandled the challengers while accompanied by the vocal stylings of the Backstreet Boys.
Along with plenty of athletically testing and strength challenging games, we were provided 2 whole pigs, a fried food box, all the beer we could drink and a stage, complete with a bubble blower, flame thrower and foam shooter.  These Koreans don't fuck around.
I also took part in a little bit of soccer with some of the Korean kids and one of my co-workers.  It made me miss soccer so bad, until of course the universal machismo kicked in when the Korean men joined the game and not only refused to pass me the ball, but acknowledge that I was anywhere near the field.  Took me back to my Monterey Bay indoor games, fighting with the Mexican dudes that would come crash our games.
Monday was Canadian Thanksgiving.  Some of our fellow coworkers that we hadn't met until the picnic happen to live in our building and were hosting a nice like pot-luck and were nice enough to invite the new kids.  I brought some wasabi mashed potatoes (courtesy of Dad's amazing recipe).  It was a nice little gathering with our friendly neighbors from the north eh...even though most of them don't know what their celebration is aboot.  Happy Thanksgiving Canada!  
So before I part, I have compiled my list of the top 10 things I have learned so far in Korea...

10.  Lines are not a suggestion...
These people are nuts when it comes to getting in lines.  Whether it be for the bus, the subway, the elevator, waiting in line for a cheeseburger, if you are not breathing down the person's neck in front of you, you are not in line.  I have been cut by many an old lady for not being properly placed in these so called lines.

9.  If there is an open door you must run through it, no matter who you trample on your way in...
So, say you get into one of these mandatory lines that I previously mentioned...once in said line, you are obligated to stampede into whatever the desired destination of the line may be.  You are not allowed to kindly let the person in the subway car or the elevator exit before making you grand and much anticipated entrance.  You MUST, without haste, enter, taking down the elderly, pregnant and handicapped upon access.

8.  No talking on public transportation...
It is an absolutely heinous notion to think that making idle chit chat while riding on any form of public transportation is acceptable...and the Koreans will let you know that...in their loudest and most offending voice.  Nevermind a subtle whisper, a light chuckle or giggle.  These forms of sound are prohibited, along with coughing too loudly or talking on a cellular device.  And, not only will they scream at you to stop, they will then proceed to talk to other Korean people about how rude you were for talking, in a voice louder that the original sound that was made.

7.  SQUAT, SQUAT, SQUAT
Squatting is the position of choice for most Koreans, from what I have gathered. Instead of real sit down toilets in public restrooms there are holes in the ground which you...you guessed it, squat over.  Men and women can frequently be found resting their legs on a long day by squatting...ANYWHERE.  in the subway, on the street.  Chair??? What's a chair?  
6.  English is cool...
Even if it makes absolutely no sense.  If your advertisement, song, clothing, etc. has English on it, no matter how misspelled, grammatically incorrect, or incompetently translated it is, it is cool.  I saw a sweatshirt on a lady that said "Sea World.  Shiny silver bacon leaves" or something to that effect...she was o, so posh!
5.  BLEND IN
Rarely will you find a Korean with any colored hair besides black or brown.  No highlights, no fun and funk colors, no tiny nose studs or tattoos of any sort.  Blend, blend, blend...or stick out like a sore thumb and get stared at like me.  Either way...your choice.
4.  The bigger the better...
I have tried to find fashion trends here in Korea.  There is no fall color or true staple or method to the madness of the dress code here.  The only thing that really stood out is this...oversized clothing.  Pre-arrival I worried that it would be quite a task to find clothing here.  I was pleasantly mistaken and found that these women wear their clothes far, far larger than they rightfully should.  They sport shirts to their knees and pants that are ridiculously gargantuan for their petite frames.  Maybe I will do some shopping after all, and show what a size large SHOULD look like when worn correctly.
3.  Touching vs TOUCHING...
In this country, personal space is a thing of fairy tales and mythical lands far, far away.  You will often find, despite the rampant homophobia, men holding the hands of men and women interlocking fingers with one another as a sign of friendship.  Sara and I tried it and it just wasn't our thing.  Maybe the stigma of what it means in the states drove us away from the embrace, or maybe our person space bubble is far to encompassing for this country.  Either way, touching in a friendly, non-sexual manner is good and encouraged.  Sexual touching though...bad, bad, bad.  Korean girls believe that Korean boys have koodies until they are out of high school.  If you ever want to punish a Korean kid, make them partner up with a member of the opposite sex.  There is no kissing, petting, talk of kissing or petting, thinking about either of the two, allowed in Korea...guess the American space bubble doesn't encompass that kind of "touching", where we seem to be pretty liberal a society.
2.  Superstitions...
My favorite so far is that if you sleep with the fan/air conditioning/any kind of cooling device on, it will lower your core temperature so much that you WILL die.  They hate the sun...will do anything to stay out of it.  Rain will burn your skin, ergo they carry an umbrella everywhere.  If you drink anything, even water while you are eating you will eat too much and get fat.  Just a mindless stream of crazy do's and don't consume the daily lives of this country.

and lastly...

1.  Kimchi...
It is the signature Korean dish.  It is served as a side with everything.  It is the equivalent to bread and butter, french fries, veggies on the side.  It is the one thing that is agreed upon to be acceptable with every meal, mixable with every animal by product, and still ok to be consumed on its own.  Whether it is fresh or packaged, if there is kimchi on the table, it will be eaten.

thats all for now!  come back next week!

love love love
erika :)

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